When you're burning out, it may seem like nothing you do can make a difference - yet there is GOLD hidden in your struggles.
Have you ever felt so low that it seemed to you like you could never enjoy life again?
This is how you feel, when you are burning out.
It could be, because people you trusted have betrayed you, or exploited your kindness, it might be after a divorce or bad breakup or because of a job where you were made to feel, that you could do nothing right. You may be abusing yourself by overworking, and not taking care of yourself and your own needs.
Regardless of how your burnout has come about, you need to start taking responsibility for your own feelings and start on the road to recovery.
And while everyone’s recovery will be different, I would like to share 12 steps that are essential in bouncing back from Burnout, starting with the first three today!
NO INSTANT CURE
When you are in a state of burnout, it takes time for your body and mind to move from a crisis state back to an operational state and then to a more empowered state of self.
How much time this journey takes depends on your personal circumstances and on how you tackle this journey. It sure is NOT a competition. It is all about learning from your experiences and about moving on wards and upwards – spiritually speaking. There are lessons here, about you, about what and who you really are.
It might take anywhere between several months and several years, so emerge as a new and stronger self, after burning out.
12 KEYS TO BOUNCING FORWARD FROM BURNOUT – Part 1
Each story of burnout will be different, and I offer these 12 steps in the hope that they may help you in some way. Here are the first three:
1. TALK TO SOMEONE
This is perhaps the hardest step. A lot of people who are experiencing burnout are strong, capable and often very successful individuals. Some of us resist seeking help because of conditioning, pride or the sense of “having to be able to cope myself” – or even shame.
Is it probably your strengths that will trick you to believe that you have to be stronger than your circumstances - and this can be the very cause of burnout. There is NOTHING to be ashamed of about burnout. Life throws us many curve-balls and each of us is entitled to “lose the plot” once in a while and learn that as humans, we have limitations that we may not be aware of. We can fall apart - and then regroup our self. This can be a process of tremendous growth and insight, and have us emerge stronger, happier and more content. There are REASONS why we burnout, and discovering them will inform your path to recovery.
Start by telling someone safe that you have a problem. It’s tough, but it’s the first step toward wellness and recovery. When share your problem with others, you also finally end up admitting to yourself and lessening the burden and loneliness that comes with feeling burned out.
2. DO GET HELP
You can’t and don’t have to do this alone. You could see counselor and talk to friends who will walk the walk with you. Talk to your doctor and to a trained professional. And you need others.
Many people prefer to work through their own problems, but burnout is not a good issue for this.
It feels like having the carpet pulled out under your feet and it may feel like you cannot even recognise yourself… burnout can be bigger than life.
So get a community of love and support if you have access to that - do get help.
LEAN INTO YOUR FRIENDS
This was included in Point 2 but some guys would have missed it. Friends: You need them. For the men: please take my word for this. If you do not have friends you are close to and feel that you can be open with, this is where some GOLD is hidden for you… find people you can be open with. Lean into your friendships. Get friends to come to your home, or to call you. You may find that some people you never thought would make a difference to your life will – even strangers.
Have conversations with people that may give you hope – if you have no-one pray! You will be surprised where your answers and help may come from.
3. START SETTING BOUNDARIES
Chances are, the reason why you're burning out is because you have trouble setting boundaries.
Whether it is in your workplace, with your partner or others, healthy boundaries allow you to take care of your own needs and to keep in the good and keep out what is less than good for you. I often find, that clients that see me with burnout and anxiety related problems have trouble setting good boundaries.